Life is for the Alive
by Tweekers186
Summary: Sweeney Todd is breaking. The Judge is dead. What's the point now? To seek comfort in a bottle of gin perhaps. He has nothing left to fight for really. Then he meets his daughter...Maybe she, or someone else can help him become who he once was. /Will put a better summary up when I think of one... v v/


**Hi! Been writing Sweeney Fanfics since 2007 but only decided to actually post one now .-.**

**Ok so this story starts just after he kills the Judge, Also in this story he has not killed the beggar woman and Johanna doesn't open the Trunk while Sweeney is there, also though Toby is suspicious he didn't do the whole /going to the beadle/ thing so Mrs Lovett hasn't locked him in the bake house~ . So that clarifies things!**

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><p>The judge was finally dead. The beadle was dead. He was satisfied, finally.<p>

What was the point in anything now though? He had succeeded in killing the judge. His was assuaged. He felt so empty though. His Wife was dead. Daughter was probably running off with that sailor boy as we speak. He had nothing left. He shook his head trying to stop thinking. He'd only made it this far because he's suppressed most of his feelings. He's suppressed who he used to be. Barker. Todd looked down at his friend resting on the barber chair. The blood of Turpin beginning to dry on the shining silver. He then glanced up to his reflection in the mirror, a monster. That's the only word that could explain what he saw. He was covered in blood, oh so much blood. If Lucy saw him like this, what he has become, what would she think? Would she still love him? Though it didn't matter...she was gone. And he was basically gone too. He picked the razor up from the chair and folded it, placing it in his holster. He made his way to the door after.

Sweeney made his way down the stairs to Mrs Lovett's shop, not caring if people saw him even though he was soaked in blood. He walked through the shop to go to the back part where the bathroom was, he could he hear Mrs Lovett down in the bake house as well. Once he got to the bathroom he closed the door then turned the tap at the sink on, he removed his gloves before cupping both of his hands together and placing them under the water to fill it before splashing the water over his face. He repeated cupping his hands under the water and splashing the water on his face a few times, did it with his hair has well as his white streak was currently red.

Most of the blood from his face and hair was gone. His clothing was still soaked though. He stepped out of the bathroom. He was about to make his way back up to his barber shop but decided against it, too many ghosts up there. Ghosts he couldn't handle right now. He sat himself down in the front area of the pie shop, all the curtains were luckily closed so even though it was late at night there'd be no chance of someone looking in and seeing a man covered in blood.

Mrs Lovett exited the Bake house. She was going to go see Todd. She knew the judge was dead. She was hoping he'd now be happy. Oh how she longed to see him happy. She made her way to the front of the shop, dusting her dress with her hands. Upon looking up she noticed Sweeney sitting at the table, which was unusual.

"Mr. T!" Nellie smiled. "Was just about to come check up on you I was." She sat her self next too Todd, a bit too close for his comfort actually. "Will be able to finally serve you that Judge pie you requested now too" She chuckled to herself. "How ya feeling? Ya finally got 'im"

Sweeney wasn't listening to her speak. He could hear her but was ignoring it, she always talks his ears off so he's learnt to ignore it. His eyes hadn't moved from the floor.

"Mr T?"

"Gin."

"What?" Nellie cocked her head, a tad shocked that he actually spoke something.

"Gin." He repeated in the same mellow tone.

Finally hearing what he said Mrs Lovett nodded her head and when to the back room. She could see Toby sleeping nice and soundly. This made her smile, little bugger looked so innocent. She picked up the half full bottle of gin that was next to him before giving him a soft pat on the head. She made her way back to the barber, getting a glass along the way. Upon returning she placed them both in Front of Todd on the table.

Sweeney Grabbed the bottle and ignored the glass. He threw it back downing half of the contents that remained in the bottle in mer seconds, before slamming it back down on the table hissing at the burning sensation in his throat.

"In Lord's name Mr T! You better slow down there love!" Mrs Nellie said moving the bottle slightly away from him to suggest he stop there. He grunted, annoyed at her. He reached out for the bottle and took another swig, much smaller though his time. Mrs Lovett sighed placing her hand upon his back in a comforting way. "I'm here for you dearie." As if she didn't even exist he took another sip. "Gonna go straight to your head that is. Probably gonna throw it all up too the way you're going."

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><p>Johanna could barely breathe. She was suffocating inside the trunk, it smelt horrid too, kind of like blood but she wasn't sure. She had heard talking. Then yelling. Then a weird gurgling sound. Then well she wasn't sure. She was certain she had heard Turpin though, it made her cringe when she did. Johanna tried to keep calm. The room had become silent so she was about to open the trunk but as she lifted her head slightly she could hear a man mumbling. She didn't recognise his voice though, so she decided to wait a little longer. Not long after this she heard foot steps then the door to shop opening and closing. The footsteps were fading away. She had to get out of this trunk, she raised her head again to see if she could hear anything before opening the trunk slightly. She peeked outside and smiled to herself as she noticed the coast was clear. She stepped out, she was glad she now had fresh air.<p>

Johanna sat upon the trunk now, waiting for the sailor to return to her. She was so happy, she was finally free. The sound of quick foot steps startled her. They were making their way up the stairs. She thought of getting back into the trunk but she could not bare go back in there. Instead she went hid behind the largish broken mirror. She heard the bell of the door ring as it was opened, this caused her to hold her breath.

"Johanna!" The voice said.

The girl came out from behind the mirror. "Anthony! Thank god you're here." She smiled at the boy, as she ran over to him.

He embraced her, before removing the hat from her head, exposing her beautiful blonde hair. "So beautiful." He smiled, causing her to blush. "Where's Mr Todd?" He questioned.

She looked up at him. "I haven't seen him.."

"Oh. Strange. We'll check down stairs if he's there, to thank him for allowing you to stay here for the half hour. Or at least tell Mrs Lovett to tell him."

She nodded. Anthony grabbed her small, slender wrist and and they walked out of the barber shop, making their way down the stairs to the pie shop.

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><p>Suddenly his head was throbbing. He was drunk. The room was spinning around Sweeney. "M-Mrs Lovett.." He cleared his throat. "No, Nellie I mean.."<p>

Mrs Lovett's eyes widened slightly at hearing her first name escape from his lips, he has never referred to her by it before. "Yes Mr T?" She was curious to anything he had to say. She could tell he was drunk or at least a little tipsy. Maybe this would be the only time they could talk properly.

He looked at her, "Thank you."

"For what dearie..?" she questioned.

"For..." He couldn't quite think of the words to say, her face was blurry in his eyes. He felt tears well in his eyes. In anger out of feeling this he punched the table hard causing Nellie to jump a little in fright, 'Sweeney Doesn't cry! What the hell is going on?!' he thought to himself. He didn't even know why he was to be honest; perhaps everything was just getting too much. He wiped the tears that had luckily not fallen yet away from his eyes before clearing his throat. He took another sip of the gin. "For everything you've done" it came out in a slur but Nellie could understand what he said.

The baker smiled, grabbing a hold of the barber's hand. "No reason to be thanking me for anything love."

Todd shook her hand off before reaching to his holster, pulling the Razor out and placing it on the table. Turpin's blood was still stained across the blade. He smiled slightly at the sight of this before frowning as he began thinking if his Lucy, of how Turpin touched her, how she swallowed the arsenic that caused her demise. He'd do anything to have her in his arms again. "Nellie.." Mrs Lovett gazed at his eyes that were staring at the blade, "What..What was the last thing Lucy ever said to you..?"

A little caught off guard at the question, though she wasn't shocked he asked it, she tried to think of a believable response. "I don't remember exactly sadly, but it when along the lines that she loved you and little Johanna."

"Mm" Was all he could muster as a reply. He felt tears welling in his eyes, he knew why though, Lucy. Johanna. When they were all actually happy. This sensation was weird though to Sweeney. He hadn't cried since Australia. For the first few months of being there all he'd do is cry himself to sleep, hoping he'd wake up with it all being a dream. That he'd wake up with Lucy beside him, her arms around her Benjamin, comforting him.

He didn't bother wiping them away this time. He let the tears fall. Mrs Lovett felt like her heart dropped when she saw this, she'd never seen him cry. Never thought she would, not that there was anything wrong with it. It broke her heart to see him in such a state. She contemplated hugging him but decided against it as he'd told her a long time ago he hated it. Instead she just placed her hand on his back.

"I want to be with her.." His voice cracked. More tears falling down his pale face. He took another gulp of the gin, finishing off the bottle.

Nellie's hand was tracing small circles on his back in a way to smooth him. "I know love, I know."

Sweeney stood up angrily and picked up the empty bottle of gin, throwing it across the shop causing a very loud smashing sound. The glass shattered everywhere. "No you don't know!" He screamed at her. She wasn't scared or anything, she had a worried look on her face.

"Calm down Mr Todd.." She said in a gentle way standing up, looking up at him, giving him a small smile.

He just stared blankly at her. Tears were still falling from his sunken eyes but there was no longer any sign of emotion on his face. He then looked away, his gaze averting to the razor on the table. "I need her... I need to be with her.." He reached for the razor picking it up. Nellie was unsure about what he was doing. "She.. I.." He held the razor in front of his face, looking at his reflection in the blade. "I want to be with her.." He brought the razor to his throat and closed his eyes. Mrs Lovett's eyes widened.

"Mr T! Don't!" She screamed.

Then suddenly the side door to the shop opened. Todd's eyes reopened, the blade still against his throat, and turned his gaze to the door. As did Mrs Lovett. The young Sailor boy walked in with a young pale girl following just behind him.

The boy smiled noticing the barber was there "Mr Todd-" Anthony stopped after having actually properly look scene in front of him. The man's clothes were drowned in red. Tears streaked his face. And he had a razor held against his throat! Anthony just stood there in slight shock, trying to figure out the correct words to say or if he should just leave.

Johanna stepped to the side from behind Anthony, to see what was happening, it was a shock to her.

Sweeney's eyes widened at the sight of Johanna. His arm fell dead, causing him to drop the razor before taking a tiny step towards the girl causing the girl to get a kind of frightened look on her face. Nellie observed the scene, unsure if she should intervene. He was drunk, so she wasn't sure what he'd do.

He took another step towards Johanna. "L-Lu..." He slurred. The girl could smell the alcohol on his breath even though he was probably 2 meters away. "Lucy.. You've come.." Taking another few steps forward, placing both if his hands on Johanna's cheeks. The girl looked so frightened.

Anthony snapped out of this shocked state and stared at the two. "Mr Todd.. This is Johanna.. Turpin's ward." He stated.

Todd looked at Anthony with a confused look. "Johanna.." Then looked back at Johanna, removing his hands from her cheeks as he noticed she looked uncomfortable. "Sorry.." He said to the girl. He stepped back a bit to give her space. "You look just like your mother.."

"What sir..?" The Blonde asked.

"..Nothing" He then turned around and picked his razor up, retreating to the back room.

The three people that were still there stood there in an awkward silence for a moment, before Anthony cleared his throat. "Uh.. Mrs Lovett Ma'am. Johanna and I should be off now.." His eyes then turned to where Todd went off to. "When he's.. Better, please tell him thanks."

Lovett Nodded, "No worries love" she smiled slightly, she kind of wanted them to just leave so she could make sure Sweeney is alright.

Anthony then walked out of the the shop after smiling back at Nellie. Though Johanna didn't follow.

"Johanna?" Anthony called out to her from just outside. Though she did not move. She was confused, she wanted answers.

_"You look just like your mother.."_

**Please review, Reviews make me happy. Let me know if you want more Chapters, or if you don't understand something that's happening so I can explain it in the next chapter! :D**

**I haven't decided yet if this story is going to have any pairings but it may happen~**


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